By the light of the moon. . . . . . .

. . . . . . or the bedside lamp!

Do you sleep well?  Always a great sleeper until the mighty lifestyle changes of the past year came along, my nightly 7-8 hours were never disturbed and I'm told I rarely even moved, let alone turned over, all night long. Things have changed though and I never seem to sleep through the night any longer.  It's not so much the having to make a quick bathroom trip - that comes with age, taking medication, and the recommended drinking of a full glass of water before bed - it's the trying to get back to sleep again. On a recent night I spent almost two hours going through my life while hoping to fall back asleep. The history, the decisions made - both good and bad - the things I need to get done soon, the things I didn't do, but should have during this past useless year when time was abundant but spirit and energy was lacking. Perhaps I was beating myself harder than I should have.  After all, I'm no longer young and moving about pain free, or full of ebullient vitality and energy as in my younger days.

It feels part of the plan now. It goes with growing in the gray hair, wearing only comfortable shoes, pulling on jogger pants with elastic waistbands (even though jogging has become walking!), taking blood pressure pills, having two aspirin in a small plastic baggie close to the bed with instructions attached as to what with them if you're experiencing a heart attack, re-doing the Will, not planting young trees or slow growing shrubs, checking retirement communities and, God forbid, assisted living facilities, and whether or not to have the torn rotator cuff surgery. The list just goes on.

But, life also goes on as the list grows longer. There are good things ahead in old age too so perhaps I should write two lists.  Since getting my two COVID  vaccinations I'm beginning to feel better about life and the future. I'm ready to make plans again. I want to travel and have reservations made for going home to England this spring which I pray will be possible. I want to cruise again, do more short road trips in the USA - even though I've seen it all before I want to go again. I want to plant azaleas and hydrangeas along the back fence - they grow quickly if given TLC with sun and shade thrown in. I bought more daylily bulbs to plant for summer color, and soon I'll gather seed packets and fill pots with several types of basil and other summer herbs. Hopefully my good neighbor will supply the tomatoes again this year and I will make pesto!

All these things are keeping me awake at night - some good some bad. How about you - do you have sleep problems? Counting sheep does not work - but perhaps you have other tips to help one fall back into dreamland. . . . . . .and of course that's a whole other world to contend with. Yes, when sleep comes I dream a lot more than before!

We are having abundant sunshine at last, the ground is drying, trees are

 budding, bulbs are blooming, and the birds are singing and searching

 for nesting sites,

 I've yet another list of things to get done this week. . . . . . in the garden!

 

Winter days -

The chilly grey days of winter are actually a favorite of mine.

These weeks after the busyness of the holiday season

are always a time of longing, planning, for mulling over

 changes perhaps required in one's life, for decluttering

 not only the home but also the mind.  

On what should I focus?

Of course this year is different in so many ways

already. Coming into it dragging the heavy baggage

of a world pandemic is very hard. Daily numbers keep 

climbing - illness, treatment, and sadly death, make 

each new day a struggle.

Procrastination seems to have taken over.

Do this or do that today?  Does it matter? Who knows

about the dust bunnies under the bed, or if a shower was 

skipped on a cold morning. Just splashing water on the face

 and pulling on the comfy clothing seems enough when

nobody comes to the door anymore.

I see signs, and I love many of them.

This one cheers me up. 

Perhaps embracing each day as part of the wonderful year, 

no matter the forces trying to pull us down in so many ways,

is the secret.

A Child's Garden of Verses

Robert Louis Stevenson

Illustrated by : Charles Robinson

Books, especially picture story-books mentioned in this verse,

are always a delight, taking us back to childhood when life was

 good, people were kind, words were gentle, and smiles were

 not blocked by masks. I have several books with pictures

and love looking through them on a winter day.

The holidays have gone now, they are a memory which will remain

 clouded by a time when the world was different and dangerous.

Our children and grandchildren will remember clearly, our great

 grandchildren hardly.  

For those of us now hoping for a vaccination preventing us from an

 illness which could take us to the brink, even fling us over the cliff edge, 

but which will give us more time to make up for what was lost last

 year. . . . . .our fingers are crossed, tightly.

Yearning to travel, see far flung family and friends again, walk in

beautiful places in the world, all is so missed.

Meanwhile the garden visitors bring joy. . . . . . 

. . . . . . . along with the precious warmth of home comfort whilst awaiting

 what will hopefully come later this year. . . . . .